


Snow in the Sanctuary

by ForcedToDoThis404



Category: Wings of Fire - Tui T. Sutherland
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Animus magic, Christmas, Cold Weather, Gen, Loneliness, Mild Language, Moonbli (mentioned), Oneshot, Original Character(s), Sad, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Winter Break, scavenger sanctuary, scavengers, winter holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28332132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForcedToDoThis404/pseuds/ForcedToDoThis404
Summary: When the weather begins to remind Winter of home, business in the Scavenger Sanctuary winds down, robbing him of work to occupy his mind. Most of his staff were already home to spend well-deserved time with their families, leaving him alone with scavengers as company.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Snow in the Sanctuary

"I'll try to be back as soon as I can. I know you do get quite lonely when everyone's gone, boss," Fern quipped.

"Nonsense. These scavengers are more than enough to keep me occupied," Snow retorted.

"Are you sure about that? I can come back in like 4 days, boss. I like working here," Fern replied, concern worming into his expression. 

"I'm not firing you, for moons' sake," Snow grinned. 

"I'm just pullin' your leg," Fern grinned back. "Missing my grandkids, but I don't really want to leave. I guess these old bones just get settled here."

"Doesn't everyone? Well, if all the formalities are out of the way, surely you must have a long flight home to the Rainforest," Snow replied, shifting his gaze from Fern's piercing green eyes to the horizon. He swallowed thickly. Those green eyes reminded him of someone.

"Yeah, I suppose. Dinner would be fun with them. From what my daughter told me, those dragonets seem to be feistier than the scavengers," Fern sighed. "I guess my experience here will help back home. Listen, Snow. Are you sure you want all the staff, including, just gone for two weeks?"

"Don't worry about me. You all have been working very hard this whole year. Every last one of you has a home and a family to return to. The Sanctuary is my home and my family now. If your families can put up with you missing most of the year, I can put up with you all missing for a few weeks. Knowing you're all having a good time is what makes it passable, so please, take the time off," Snow quickly answered. Fern narrowed his eyes slightly.

Feeling uncomfortable, Snow quickly added, "Goodbye, Fern. I'll see you back here in about... 2 weeks."

Fern only smiled back, crinkling the corners of his eyes slightly, but it didn't go all the way. It was a famous saying, a true smile reaches the eyes. As much as Fern loved working at the Sanctuary, mostly as a door block for panicking scavengers, he was missing his family, but there was no doubt Fern was worried for Winter.

"See you, then. Try not to miss us too much, and enjoy your time alone," Fern replied, taking flight before Snow could say anything.

Snow watched Fern fly off into the crisp morning sun with a small sigh. Sometimes, it felt like he drove everyone away. He dropped his head and sat down on the cool stone still fatigued from the 2 all-nighters that one night's sleep didn't fully chase away. Letting the cold from the prior night seep into his body, he pressed himself into the rock. If there was one word to describe the weather today, it'd be nostalgia. The Sanctuary wasn't situated far from Jade Mountain, in one of its forested foothills, rather. Breathing the air on a cool winter morning reminded him of ice, dark seas, and chilling cold. However, that was a good thing. Being an Icewing born and raised in the Ice Kingdom, rarely leaving before nearing adulthood meant every breath of air down south felt... different. It was like moisture clung to every portion of your body, like the very air you were breathing was watery, choking. The feeling lessened considerably as the years passed, but he still very much preferred the dry, cold air winter brought with it to the humid, warmer air of summer and spring. It was a pretty small thing, relatively speaking. 

The only times his discomfort being out of the Ice Kingdom was anything more than a small thought at the back of his mind was the first time he left it with his brother, which was a disaster and ended up ripping his family apart for good; that was a mental discomfort. A more physical discomfort would be when he traveled to the Rain Kingdom with the Jade Winglet, where the air literally felt smothering, the trees too tightly packed, the animals too many to count and keep track of, going everywhere all the time, the colors too saturated. It made him lose track, at times, of the goal to hunt down his elder sister and save his brother. 

Snow quickly grew bored of the cold rock. Heaving himself up, he went back into the administrative cave for the Sanctuary. It was rather funny, wasn't it? When he first saw a scavenger, it ruined his life for a few months. Even though Narwhal and Tundra were married with three dragonets, it didn't change the fact that they didn't even operate like a couple, evident in the fact that they punished him in two separate ways, without even talking to each other, regarding his failure to bring a suitable polar bear first to the castle. But little Snow was too caught up in dreams of the scavengers. Their piercing, dragon-like eyes. It was rather haunting. He'd thought about what he'd do if he had animus powers, how if he had the gift that wasn't stolen from the Icewings, he'd create a sanctuary in the snow. A sanctuary in the snow, for scavengers, enchanted to let them live there. 

Snow chuckled, remembering how narrow-minded he was, all those years ago. He didn't need animus magic, and he certainly didn't need to build the sanctuary in the Ice Kingdom. He'd imagined it as a little wooden structure with a glass ceiling, with Icewing servants running around while he ordered studies from the top. 

The Scavenger Sanctuary was wholly different from how little Snow imagined it. Big Snow built it with funding from Jade Mountain and the Skywings, in the foothills of Jade Mountain, an hour's flight from any significant dragon city, not including Jade Mountain Academy. In fact, his sanctuary actually served as an extension of the academy, a classroom where Winter taught the importance of scientific thought and inquiry, the different ways to observe and study and report, and a location for little dragonets to interact with scavengers, with supervision. Besides the administration carved into a cliff, the sanctuary was actually a massive valley, barricaded to be insurmountable for the scavengers at the ends. A lake formed near the center, surrounded by forest and various small clearings with scavenger huts. It was large, tranquil, and safe. He made sure of that. Dragons were not allowed to be there without his express permission. Dragons were not allowed out of the administrative cave without his express permission, and it had to be during the day. A small staff composed of volunteers, trained by himself to handle scavengers and wrangle dragonets helped him in his endeavors to study the scavengers and spread the knowledge he acquired. 

Now, with his staff scattered across Phyrria, home for the winter holidays, he was stuck here, in his ultimate project, alone with scavengers. Whether or not he was actually alone, or with intelligent creatures that lived in the valley, he didn't know. He'd need more study to confirm that, though the evidence he'd currently gathered strongly pointed towards sentience and not just high intelligence. He sighed. He built it all under an alias. Only Jade Winglet and Hailstorm knew who he really was, and their lips were sealed. When he returned to Jade Mountain Academy for this specific endeavor, he'd told them his name was Snow, and he had a proposition from the Ice Kingdom. His brother, now at the top of the adult rankings and responsible for essentially all government functions, pulled some strings to ensure the letter asking for confirmation reached him and him only. With Hailstorm's confirmation and Jade Winglet vouching for Snow, he officially tied himself to Jade Mountain Academy. He then applied for a land grant from the Sky Kingdom and was granted this rich valley, under the condition that he provide them with any and all knowledge he acquired. Getting volunteers to help him run the sanctuary was relatively easy, compared to fabricating this identity. The Ice Kingdom didn't know any better. That he faked his own death. They thought he had melted like snow in harsh sunlight.

Snow sat at the reception desk that was usually occupied by Petrel, surrounded by letters from various sources, mostly bureaucrats and researchers from other tribes asking for his newest paper or an opportunity to take a tour through the sanctuary. 

It was difficult.

He had freedom from the Icewing caste. He had a scavenger sanctuary, his lifelong dream. He was past the dragon that showed him the possibility of life outside the Ice Kingdom, only to leave him in the dust. But it didn't really count for anything, at the end of the day.

Everything was built on a lie. 

He was Winter, not Snow. He lived as Snow, administrator of the Scavenger Sanctuary, mentor to many. But he was Winter. Sure, being Snow made this, all of this, possible. His brother's position was secured and Icicle was serving a relatively light sentence. His parents were satisfied, but that was all as Snow. To them, Winter was dead. It was difficult to really think about, so Snow never really thought about it, busying himself with work and research, so much so that even when his body failed him and he fell asleep, he'd be thinking about the scavengers and not himself. Winter wasn't even entirely sure what caused him to dismiss his staff for the 2 weeks. Sure, it was altruistic on the surface. They got a well-deserved break to go home to their families and friends. However, Winter just wanted time to think. He can't keep continuing on, living as Snow. 

Winter buried his face in his serrated talons, relishing the slight stings as the serrations drew over his scales, keeping him grounded in reality. The moment his thoughts drifted to Moonwatcher, his eyes started to water. He thought he was past her, but that didn't seem to be the case. She showed him what was possible. She showed him that life was more than rankings. He just didn't realize until he was watching his brother get ready to spear him. He wanted to live, he wanted a life with her. He came up with what would become his current predicament. He would fake his death, and escape the Ice Kingdom for good to live as an exile. He threw away his life, his title as a prince, all for a chance to carve out a peaceful life with her, away from all the constraints of being an Icewing prince. It was calculated, he thought, at the time, in that cave all those miles underground, but three moons, he was bad at math. His denial of his feelings for Moon resulted in permanently driving her away. He trashed his chances with her before it could even start. He didn't know it was permanent until he was back from the Ice Kingdom. He'd permanently ended any chance he could have a life with her and he didn't even know until he permanently ended his life as an Icewing prince.

Winter grit his teeth. Dead before it even hatched. Stillborn. Winter remembered when his parents forced him to stay a week at one of the villages in the lower circles. In their words, if all he was good for was to perform on tests like a peasant, he may well go live as one. They did so hoping the shock would help him improve. Life in the lower circles didn't seem very different from life as royalty. The only real differences were a lack of pressure to perform and poorer food quality, but that was it. If anything, Winter preferred it there, but he never said so to his parents. There was no end to their creativity. While standing guard outside the hatchery, as ordered by the mayor, he overheard a distressed couple being informed by the caretaker that their egg wasn't viable, that the dragonet died inside before it was ever close to breaking the shell. Stillborn. Their haunting cries and wails never left him, and whenever Winter thought about his relationship with Moon, how stillborn it was, he could understand why they reacted that way. He wanted to scream the same way.

Tears spilled over as he started sobbing, lamenting his failures, his losses. Truly, living on instead of dying at his brother's spear was the worse punishment. But he had to do this. He had to live a lie to ensure his family would remain secure while he pursued his dreams. Heh, dreams. How shallow. How fucking shallow was he? Winter dug his talons into his face, feeling the cold blood dripping down, splashing onto the cave floor. Angry tears mixing with the blue blood, diluting it into something that resembled a blue lily as the puddle on the floor started to grow. Angered sobs and panting escaped his throat. It wasn't helping, but Winter would be lying if he said it didn't feel good. He could almost feel his worthlessness dripping out with his blood and tears.

He took a few deep breathes, shuddering as the cool, dry air reminding him once more of his rightful home. He heard a few muffled yibbles and yabbles. Curiosity prompted him to remove his head from his talons and look towards the source of the sounds. A few small scavengers yelped in fear as they watched his gaze sweep over them, trying to squeeze themselves behind a rock. Winter was impressed. He didn't expect them to climb all the way up to the cave. He tried his best to shoot down his pride with anger and sadness, but couldn't find enough left to replace his pride at their curiosity and courage. He looked down, noticing the puddle of blood mixed with tears, still dripping down his talons. He looked at the scavengers again, realizing why they were scared. Sighing, he stood up and went to clean himself up at the waterfall outside. He eyed the scavengers out of the corner of his eyes as he walked by, head hung low. Their watchful gaze never left him as they exchanged hushed sounds. Running his talons through the chilled water and over his face, he hissed as he yanked a loose scale off. It'd grow back in a week or two, so he wasn't worried about his staff noticing any injuries. 

He examined it. It was smooth, round, without any blemishes or disformities, shining white like the full moons. He walked back to the cave, thumbing it between his talons, before approaching the scavengers.

Crouching down to their level and moving slowly, but not so slow they'd think he was hunting them, he held his scale in his palm out for them, a little gift. He watched them closely, eager to see how they'd react. They seemed to discuss amongst themselves, exchanging little, high-pitched, unintelligible sounds, before the largest one approached his outstretched talon tentatively, before snatching his scale and running back to the others. Winter smiled, careful to not show any teeth. He tapped the floor, then pointed at the mouth of the cave, before straightening and going to the sleeping quarters. It was only noon, but he was already drained, and for once, he felt more at peace with himself. The floor can be cleaned later, nothing a little water and serrated claws can't handle. 

By the time Winter groggily opened his eyes, it was already mid-afternoon. Scraping the dried blood on the floor into flakes then pouring water over the floor, Winter watched with grim satisfaction as the blue-tinted liquid trickled out of the cave, into the grass in front of the cave. What was he to do now? Wash away his past identity like he did his blood, and just live as Snow? Forget his family, his friends, just live as a scavenger researcher named Snow?

Winter didn't know what to do. He was essentially already doing it. Living as Snow. But he never washed away his past. He never moved past it, only buried it to fester in the depths of his mind. 

Winter glided out of the cave and flew around the tranquil valley, trying to clear his mind. His family. His family. What was so special about his family that he'd hold onto his last ties to them. Winter. Prince Winter. What was so special about that name, that title?

He was dead to them, wasn't he? Why was he insistent on clinging to his past with his metaphorical serrated claws? Was he still living as Winter because he never moved past Moonwatcher? It was Winter who fell for her, but it was Winter who pushed her away.

It was all so stupid.

So why was he still holding onto the name Winter, in the depths of his mind? Winter, the prince who was killed by his brother. Winter, the dragon who faked his death to live on for another dragon. Winter, who fell for a dragon only to be turned down. Now, Winter had nothing. No family, no friends, no dreams, right?

He had the Sanctuary. Winter looked down, seeing the water of the lake sparkling in the afternoon sun, its reflection lighting up the valley. It reminded him of the sparkling seas of the Frozen North. Along its edge, scavengers played and ran around, some were sitting with wooden poles along its edge, but Winter could tell they were watching him warily. He paid it no mind. It hurt to think about everything. It was so confusing. What was he to do?

Winter angled his body and drew his wings in, piercing through the sky as he dove headfirst into the lake, startling the scavengers. But they gathered around its edge. It seems news about Winter clawing his face spread throughout the village. 

Winter floated listlessly near the bottom, feeling the crushing weight of the near ice-cold water. He moved his tail sluggishly as he felt the air in his compressed lungs start to dry up. Discomfort grew, but Winter wanted to stay down here longer, pressed from all sides with the coolness, even as his body screamed at him to get out. Wasn't it so easy to just... stay? To just die?

What?

No!

Stop it!

GET OUT!!

Winter surged up, his momentum carrying him into the air as he gaped his mouth open, cool, refreshing, life-giving air rushing back into his lungs.

What was he thinking? 

He landed roughly on the rocky beach, gagging and coughing. There was still much to do, much to learn. He couldn't die before figuring out the scavengers now gathered around him. Running his talons over his face and flicking the water off, he opened his eyes. The scavengers took a few steps back.

"What are you guys doing here? Aren't you all deathly afraid of me? The fearsome ice dragon that runs this whole place. I captured every last one of you and threw you here. I'm evil, aren't I? Go do whatever stupid scavenger things you morons do," Winter snarled, anger welling up. Why was he even talking to them? They couldn't understand him, could they? Could they?

_"Winter!" Turtle called out, excitedly, his voice echoing throughout the cave._

_"Quiet!" Winter hushed. "I'm not Winter anymore. I'm Snow. If you or any other dragon has a loose snout, it could get me killed."_

_"Oh, sorry. I keep forgetting. Maybe it's better if I just leave you alone then," Turtle said, dejectedly._

_"No, no. Don't go," Winter pleaded, suddenly afraid. He sighed, pushing the fear of being alone down. "So, why did you visit me? I'm still looking through the volunteer applications. I mean, if you want to volunteer here, I'd be more than happy to have you here."_

_"Well, not quite. I just wanted to give you this," Turtle said, his posture straightening with pride as he struggled to hide a grin. Winter looked at his outstretched talon. A conch shell._

_"A shell? Why?" Winter asked._

_"Well, the entire Sea Kingdom was celebrating the Winter Solstice, the shortest day of the year, and we all give presents to each other. I know how important scavengers are to you, how interested you are in them. So I thought I'd give you a tool, something to help you with your studies," Turtle said, the grin he was trying to suppress finally breaking through._

_"Well... that'd be extremely helpful. But I don't see how a shell is supposed to do that," Winter said. "Did you enchant it or something? What does it do?"_

_"Yes to the first question, and you find out for the second one," Turtle beamed._

_"I find out? How would I know what it does if I don't even know what to look for? What if it was a one time use enchantment?" Winter asked._

_"It's not a one-time thing, and you'll know what it does. It should jump out at you. If you can't figure out what it does when it happens, well I'll just chalk it up to you being stupid since I made the enchantment do something really wild, but that's only if your conjecture regarding scavengers is correct," Turtle assured Winter._

_He gazed down at the shell again. So it's got something to do with my conjecture on scavengers and I'll know what it does since it'll be obvious._

_"Well, thanks a lot, Turtle. I'll try my best to crack my hard head on this little puzzle you gifted me with," Winter said, with a half-hearted smile._

_Turtle nodded. "Happy Winter Solstice."_

_Winter never saw Turtle again. It's been two years since that Winter Solstice._

Winter was no closer to figuring out the enchantment on the shell, but that's because he never tried. He had set it in a desk drawer and never opened it again. The days since he got it, he had mulled over what it'd do. But he spent less and less time on it. Turtle never came to visit again. Maybe he'd pushed him away, maybe Turtle didn't want to be friends with him anymore. 

Winter sat down at the desk, water still dripping off him. He opened the drawer and set the shell out before him, eyes taking in every detail of the faded shell. 

Maybe Turtle knew that if he buried his knowledge on Winter, there'd be less to trace back to Winter himself. It probably hurt Turtle as badly as it did Winter, to stay apart to protect his secret.

Winter groaned. Another friend was gone because of his mistake. Why did he just HAVE to live on? He should have died at his brother's hand. 

Winter growled and punched himself in the face. This train of thought grew very old, very fast. He had better things to do. Having pushed down his self-pity and insecurity, he turned his attention back to the conch shell set before him. He was here because of a hunch. In the four or so years the Sanctuary started operations, he'd never actually tried to talk to the scavengers as if they were a dragon. Never told them what he thought they'd think of him, never told them to piss off like they were annoying him. Sure they annoyed him sometimes with their tenacity and yibble yabbles that grated his ears, sure he wondered what they thought of him, all the time in fact, but the curiosity of actually talking to them welled to the surface.

"The effect is obvious, but only if your conjecture is correct. What would that mean?" Winter whispered to himself. He drummed the surface of the desk. He had a lot of conjectures about scavengers. What exactly would Turtle be thinking when he enchanted it?

Winter was drawing a blank and it was excruciatingly frustrating. He was almost tempted to claw his face again, but he needed to let it heal before his staff came back. Gingerly placing it into his old Jade Mountain neck pouch, he placed it around his neck, remembering briefly when he first received it from Fatespeaker. How were Fatespeaker and Starflight doing?

Winter didn't think it really mattered. Figuring out the conch would take some of the boredom and festering feelings out. Landing in the forest, he bent his limbs, straightening out with a small smile. Something as simple as just landing and standing up with confidence made him feel better about himself. Strolling through the forest's lengthening shadows, Winter felt the cool mountain air flow over him, the soft dirt underneath his serrated claws. The soft rustling of the trees tickled his ears pleasantly. For the first time in what seemed to be forever, Winter didn't concern himself with anything but just being in the present. Nothing from the past, and nothing in the future. For a short while, he could enjoy the present. But all good things must come to an end. At least for now.

Winter's ears swiveled around. He heard voices. It sounded like dragons. Winter narrowed his eyes and clenched his muscles. The Scavenger Sanctuary was off-limits to all dragons without express permission from Winter, especially now during the Winter Holidays all tribes observed, from Snow Peak Day for the Skywings to the Winter Solstice Celebrations of the Sea Kingdom. Winter rushed forward eager to get his claws and teeth on any dragon that would dare break the rules or threaten his scavengers. Once the voices got clear enough, however, Winter's charge ground to a halt. 

"Are you sure the ice dragon's scales will make a good star for the Christmas tree? Klipper found a small diamond at the creek a few weeks back, and we already have the wood carving with a seat for the gem to be the star," a voice said.

"Maybe so, but the ice dragon gave his scale to us, which is pretty nice. Look it at, it's the size of my hand and it's shiny as hell!" another voice retorted, holding out the scale Winter gave the scavengers some hours ago.

"Yeah, no. I don't know man. It just seems wrong to use it for something as trivial as a tree decoration. I mean you saw how distraught the poor lad was. Clawing at his own face like that. I don't think I'll ever get the sounds out of my head."

"I don't think anyone will. I thought he was gonna eat us for sure," the smallest scavenger said, the tallest scavenger shot her a look.

"Besides, if we put it up for everyone to see, they're gonna ask where we got it."

"If they ask, just tell them we found it."

"I still don't think it's right to use something he clawed out of his face as a decoration for a blasted tree. Christmas isn't even about the tree, I don't know where the whole tree thing came from."

"I don't think we're alone here. Someone or something is watching us," the smallest scavenger squeaked. Winter raised an eye ridge. Did they notice him already?

"Yeah, something doesn't feel right. It's probably the ice dragon. Fuck. If it is him we're fucked."

"Don't be stupid. Thinking that would make sense when he first snatched us maybe, but some of us have been here for years. The ice dragon that runs this place fucking loves us."

"How can you be so sure? He just growled at us after nearly drowning before stomping off. I think he's just mentally unstable and going to snap one of these days and massacre us. For all we know, this could be a fucking cattle ring."

"If this was a cattle ring, he's doing a shit job at farming us. Even the ones who've been here the longest, almost 5 years, don't recall anyone going missing after being put here."

"Well, maybe not, but I still don't trust the ice dragon. He's always watching us and being creepy."

"Never at night, and whenever there are other dragons, he seems to always be there."

"Yeah, yeah. Let me ask you again. How on God's green earth did you convince my sister and I to go to the cave where all the dragons are?"

"We saw all the dragons fly away over the last few weeks. Are you so stupid you missed it?"

"Why'd they suddenly leave?"

"Probably some winter migration thing like birds. Idunno, you ask the dragon."

"Haha funny. Why don't you ask the dragon? You practically crawled into his palm this morning."

Winter almost wanted to snort, to laugh and giggle about the absurdity of the situation like a newly hatched dragonet playing peekaboo with their parents. Here he was, wearing an enchanted shell hear scavengers, the little intelligent, ape-like creatures that yibble and yabble, talk about being cattle. Should he go out and rectify the situation? They were talking about using it as a decoration of some kind, which was interesting. If Winter did go talk to them, he should ask about it. 

What was he doing?

Deliberating what to do when Turtle gave him a gift, a literal part of his soul, to aid in his studies. Go out and talk to them, you anti-social fuck!

Winter took a tentative step forward, slightly wincing when the small group of scavengers heard him and looked over.

"Wow, talk about timing. Man, Rudy, you gotta be careful what you wish for."

"Great fucking job, Silan. You talked about the ice dragon so much he fucking shows up," a scavenger Winter gathered was named Rudy shouted at who Winter believed was Silan, the biggest one.

"What the fuck are you being so loud for?" Silan shot back. "It's not like he can understand you."

"Exactly, but instead of roasting us like those stupid sky dragons, he's gonna turn us into a fucking popsicle," the other scavenger retorted. "Since I'm about to die, might as well have some fun.

"He's just standing there, menacingly," the third, smallest scavenger finally squeaked out. She was probably Rudy's sister. 

"Astute observation. I thought I was blind. Fuck me," the second scavenger shouted, glancing quickly between the dragon and his friend and sister, before sprinting off. "I call dibs on not dying!"

Winter chuckled lightly, smiling. "You're a feisty bunch." 

What a great way to introduce yourself to scared scavengers. 

Silan and the third scavenger stared at Winter. "So you do talk?"

"Well, I had a little help, but yes, now I can talk to you little creatures," Winter smiled, then started laughing. "Three moons, I'm an idiot."

It was so simple, Winter couldn't believe he missed it all these years. A translator, provided the scavengers were as smart as Winter believed.

"It's as much a shock to me as it was to you, trust me," Winter continued.

"Umm..."Silan started.

"How much did you hear?" the smallest scavenger said, quietly.

"Something about my scale as a tree decoration, then Rudy arguing about how unstable I was," Winter replied. "I'll admit I wasn't having a good time. It was some family issues. You guys can probably relate."

"Rudy tells Valayna here to shut up all the time, then wonders why she doesn't talk much," Silan said. "If he wasn't such a good cook, I'd probably try to beat some sense into him, but then he wouldn't let me eat his food. Fuck I'm hungry now."

"Please don't eat us," Valayna said, hiding behind Silan.

"I won't. Scavengers are off-limits for me, especially now. It'd be murder to eat you guys," Winter assured them. 

"Promise?" Valayna squeaked.

"Promise. Besides, I'm kind of lonely right now. All my staff members are gone for the winter holidays and it's just me here. I guess I'd look insane to any other dragon, but I don't really mind talking to you scavengers," Winter said, sitting down in the cool moss and dirt, patting a section of dirt in front of him. The scavengers sat down in front of him, and Winter smiled. They truly were intelligent and sentient. Now, how does he get the word out without drawing attention to himself?

"How come we never understood you and vice versa before?" Silan asked.

"I figured out something a friend gave me. It to help us understand each other," Winter said, feeling the pouch around his neck.

"That's so cool," Silan said, eyes wide with curiosity. Winter chuckled again, impressed with the amount of fire and spirit these scavengers possessed. The clearing fell silent as the three sat in silence. 

"So, where did Rudy run off to?" Winter asked.

"Probably to tell the village that Valayna and I got fucked over, heh," Silan said, smirking. "Imagine his face when we go back."

"You guys were talking about using my scale as a tree decoration. Wanna tell me about it?" Winter prompted.

"Ah, the Christmas tree. So, every year, during the winter, we celebrate and commemorate God giving humanity his only son Jesus, who died for all our sins so that we may achieve eternal life through faith and love. We do this by giving each other gifts and putting it all under a Christmas tree, which we open the next day and we all have a good time," Valayna said.

Winter smiled. "That's very interesting. For the record, you're more than welcome to use my scale as a decoration. I don't really care what happens to it."

"Really? I guess Rudy was just being picky about it then. He didn't want to cheapen what you went through," Silan replied.

"That's fair. Just tell him what I said, okay?"

"Sure..." Silan drifted off.

"Are you okay?" Winter asked.

"Yes, I'm fine. I didn't really want to ask, it was probably rude or something, I dunno. What was going on with you in the cave? I've never seen that before," Silan rambled, before stopping abruptly and looking up at Winter. Winter clenched his jaw slightly.

"Ah. You want the long version or the short version?" Winter asked.

"The short version. It's probably really personal and I don't want to distress you any further," Silan replied curtly.

"Well, I sent the last member of my staff out this morning. I had some time to think about my life. I was always so busy with studying you scavengers and writing reports about it just so I wouldn't have to think about anything. It's difficult, living under a false name, you know. But, long story short, I gave up my family, and my friends had to leave me so I'd be safe. I was selfish, and now I'm paying for it," Winter growled, misery and regret washing over him. "I was supposed to die, but I clawed my way through to keep living, but sometimes I feel like it wasn't worth it."

"That's why you were clawing yourself and trying to drown yourself in the lake..." Valayna whispered.

"I'm so sorry," Silan, muttered. He awkwardly hugged Winter's broad chest. "If it counts for anything, I'll be your friend."

Winter smiled. "Thank you. I guess living would be easier if I had a bunch of scavengers as friends."

"Why do you keep calling us scavengers? We're humans, people, not lowly scavengers," Valayna asked.

"Humans? Humans. Humans. Huh, interesting," Winter mused. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

The clearing fell silent again. Winter hated silent pauses in conversations. It was a wild idea, but what did he have to lose.

"Well, since the only dragon allowed to be at the sanctuary for the next 2 weeks or so is me, you won't mind if I join in these Christmas celebrations, would you?" Winter asked.

Silan beamed, and the smile infected Winter. "You're more than welcome, at least in my opinion. We'll have to ask the village elders first, but I'm sure they'll let you."

"Yeah... Well, I've kept you two here long enough, go back to the village. Tell them the big scary ice dragon that runs this place is really just an insecure puppy, and that you're still alive," Winter quipped.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Silan called back, before running off with Valayna, exchanging excited whispers. Winter watched them run off into the darkening forest. He'd see them again soon, he knew it. Winter couldn't help but smile. Maybe there would be something to keep him moving forward. Making a note to thank Turtle whenever he got to see him, Winter hauled himself back to the Administration Cave. He still hadn't told them his name. Maybe it'd be better to tell them his name was Snow.

Winter didn't really know, but he could sort it out later. Standing at the entrance to the cave, he paused. Looking towards the darkening sky, he started to reminisce. Bright blue was being replaced with purples and blacks, much like the polar winters. The air felt almost as cold, too.

Moonwatcher. He cheated death and jeopardized his family's position as royalty for an opportunity to be with Moon, but he had pushed her away already. How was she doing this chilly evening? Winter's heart clenched slightly, but he let it go. Qibli was his friend, and in many ways they were similar, but Qibli didn't deny his feelings for Moonwatcher from the get-go like Winter did. Winter hoped they were doing well. To the victors the spoils, he supposes. It was slightly bitter, thinking about those two, but Winter truly did wish them well. 

Sometimes Winter wished that he didn't have to live as someone else. He wished he could see all his friends stay. But they had to leave, for his safety, lest his true identity is revealed. He last saw Turtle two years ago, Qibli and Moonwatcher 3 years ago. Kinkajou last came by when he first opened the Sanctuary. He didn't know the whereabouts of Peril. He didn't even know if his family was doing well. Yet this same train of thought somehow didn't bring him the same grief it did just this morning. It was probably just a gut feeling that they were all well. 

Why? Was he suddenly over it all? The pouch. It had to be the pouch. He could talk to the scavengers. Crazy as it might seem to others, they were just like dragons. Winter didn't have to keep who he was from them. He could tell them he was Winter, and the Icewings won't hound him and his family. Even though his family knew nothing of him anymore, even though he sacrificed so much for them with nothing in return, it seems he finally saw the first inkling of return. His new family and friends were the Sanctuary, as it should have been from the start. Winter started laughing. It seems somethings wouldn't change. He was denying his feelings about the sanctuary like he did Moon. But, it seems the sanctuary would always be here, and it'll always be ready for when he finally accepted his lot in life. 

His friends probably didn't want to be separate from him, but they did so for him. He didn't push them away, he never did. It was time to move on, for their sakes, and for his own. Winter believes he's ready to truly move on. It was time for "Winter" to become Snow. A clean slate. 

He held the pouch in his talons gingerly. A single tear slid down his narrow face. 

"Thank you, Turtle," he whispered. Gifts truly did matter. He could understand why humans celebrated by giving gifts, something the proud and civilized Icewings couldn't figure out. 

"Winter?" a voice from behind him asked.

"It's Snow now," he said, turning around, but he stopped in his tracks. He could see white serrated claws. Was it an Icewing guard finally come to kill him?

"Who are you?" Snow asked, trepidly.

The Icewing just pulled back the cloak. A familiar pattern of dark blue dots greeted his eyes in the fading light.

"Lynx?"

**Author's Note:**

> If there are any typos that need to be fixed, please let me know. Leave your comments on the work and what you think I can improve on, or just how much you loved it. I had a lot of fun writing this and took inspiration in some of the scenes from personal experience. The prime example was describing how Winter felt breathing the air down south compared to in the Ice Kingdom. I was able to draw on my experience going on a trip to Kentucky from Washington State.


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